One heart, one widow connect suicides of 2 men

I guess everyone is in a hurry to blame that woman...it looks so obvious! Of course, something must be wrong with her for changing husbands so often. On another hand, it seems to me that no one should look for justifications to these guys' suicides. They were unable fo face the music once they fell for her and gave up.: no survival capacity. Proof is: the other three exes survived... Suicide seems cruel because it is so final. But it is an unforgivable lack of responsibility and an unbearable weakness. (Families of suicidals, please forgive me, but the truth is often crude and cruel).

Sounds like more of a scary story than anything.

What a bunch of screwed up morons.

If she didn't shoot these men herself, then she drove them to shoot themselves. Either way, she's bad news.

And any man who gets himself invovled with a woman with her history, is asking for problems.

Such ridiculous mistakes in life-- ending a 38 yr marriage to be with a woman who's been married >2 times--a woman who is shallow enough to complain that her husband makes less money than her??? Didn't she know this before she married him? Am I supposed to feel sorry for these characters? The only one I'm sorry for is Elaine.

If she didn't shoot these men herself, then she drove them to shoot themselves. Either way, something is wrong with her.

And any man who gets himself invovled with a woman with her history, is asking for problems.

Such ridiculous mistakes in life-- ending a 38 yr marriage to be with a woman who's been married >2 times--a woman who is shallow enough to complain that her husband makes less money than her??? Didn't she know this before she married him? Am I supposed to feel sorry for these characters? The only one I'm sorry for is Elaine.

Okay, you can say I'm jumping to conclusions, BUT did you notice they say while the death has been ruled a suicide, they have not closed the case. That seems significant.
I have a funny feeling we will be hearing it was murder, not suicide, and then they will reopen the case of the first husband who supposedly commited suicide. One strange thing is that this man was about to take his very young stepson to the dentist. Wouldn't you think he could hold off shooting himself till after the kid was not around?

Just who shoots their self behind the right ear? It is one strange story and If I was investigating I would give strong credence to homicide. I mean most of the time they chose the temple, mouth, under the chin and women like the chest area. I have never heard of someone shooting then selves behind the ear. Others might shoot him there if they were behind him and right handed.

This is a very strange story to say the least. Who shoots their self behind the ear? In the temple, in the mouth, under the chin and a woman will often chose the chest. If I was investigating I would treat this as a homicide. This man was likely shot by some one standing behind him with the gun in their right hand. That just jumped out at me as not being right.

I just reread the article and it is even stranger now. No one that I know keeps his favorite shotgun in a storage shed and even stranger that he was shot in the right side of the neck. Must have had really short barrell on that shotgun or he had really long arms. It just gets stranger and stranger. It sure looks like a homicide to me. Make that homocides.

I read that story and it sure rang bells for me, because I was married to a woman like that, but a bit more careful. I have told my current lady friend that I consider myself lucky to be alive and that experience is why I will never marry again. It's a strange thing for someone trained to observe dark motives and methods in organizations and people to have happen. I just segregated that from my personal life almost completely. Almost, but not quite. It has been years now since we split. But it is still something that haunts me.

I rarely talk about it except when I must. Perhaps the anonymity of sorts on the internet is letting me talk. Few people believe a man if he talks about such things. I had friends laugh at me and tell me that their wives had said "I'm gonna kill you!" and not to take it seriously because they didn't mean it. She never said it though, just - things happened. I tend to think now that men being murdered in that particular way are much more common than we realize.

The woman was an excellent actor, completely self-centered. What initially made me wonder was when she tried hard (and very skilfully) to wheedle me into buying a pistol, when she refused to buy one for herself even if I paid for it. The second thing was when she pointed a Glock at my eye at a shooting range, scratching her ear in the middle of shooting. It was clear to me after that session that she was the third type of handler of guns. There are people without a clue who are dangerous. There are people that are trained who are formal and careful. And then there are people who lived with guns and handle them like extra fingers. I found out that she had been a gold medalist target shooter in a college meet. It made it hard for me to think that she could have pointed the gun at my eye as I stood behind her (wehre she wanted me to be) without knowing it. Since I was trained, my instantaneous reaction was to dive out of the way - not even conscious. It bothered me that she seemed like she was a bit angry, which was strange. She told me in the car when I expressed my concern that she was sure that the bullets were just for target practice and they wouldn't do damage if they hit. That was also very strange.

All of that I pushed aside because I didn't want to have a bad marriage. In the end I was lucky because she got so angry at my caution that she left. I think she tried to come back - shortly after she left, very early in the morning, the day after she had sent some immigrant men to pick some things up to bring to her. A key was inserted into my door and I woke up, but I had changed the lock right away, so the key did not work. I got up in time to hear light footsteps running away very fast. It would have been the perfect crime I think. She was very smart, smarter than this lady was. After I had my attorney send her a copy of my will, which cut her out and allocated $10,000 to a private investigator should I die violently, she left off. But the whole thing sure shook me up. In a way it has sharpened certain professional skills, made me more alert.

For what that's worth.

Since there is some privacy of the internet, after reading this article, I can really identify with it. Most times you hear about spousal abuse being where the man abuses the woman but I was in a 3 yr relationship once with someone who was younger than me by 15 years and knew just how to push my buttons and the mental abuse from my mate was so severe that it resulted in my seeking professional help and therapy for almost a year because I had seriously contemplated ending it all.

There is only so many times you can listen to someone yell at you. "I wish you were dead" or "I hate you" and "why don't you just kill yourself and do the world a favor" and then the next day would be "I am so sorry I said that to you" and "I love you" and "I could never hate you" and "I do not know what I would ever do without you".

My 2 kids are grown and gone (from my first relationship 25 yrs ago) and this person was my 3rd and last relationship. I have been on my own for about 8 years now with just my dogs and horses and it is peaceful and quiet and the best decision I have ever made. I will probably die this way BUT at least it is of my own terms and not dictated by someone who for a lack of a better term might be a sociopath.

The world has gone to hell in a handbasket and although that is just my personal opinion about what is happening around me everyday, I think I am alive today because before I pulled the trigger or let her pull the trigger for me, I escaped.

Fortunately, I was self-sufficent enough to toss her out on her ass with nothing but her car that I bought for her and a few grand and then as soon as the therapy was over, I sold the property in Florida and moved to another state so she could not follow me.

For what it's worth to all, before it gets really ugly behind closed doors, RUN, save YOUR life. Your material things are worthless IF your dead. You can always make more money. Buy another property. Whatever! But once your dead, there is no coming back.

I am formally educated, my mate was not. I made 4 times as much money as her and I knew how to hide it to insulate it. She was very manuipulative with her affections and I never saw the manipulation coming BUT close personal friends who knew me before I met her would ask me 2 yrs into the relationship..........."What are you doing with her?? This is not like you at all. You've changed."
At first I thought my friends did not have a clue and how dare they try to tell me about ME....... BUT I eventually learned (just in time I might add) that I was the one who was clueless. Ahh, how we learn from our mistakes.

Nuff said..........

Mike,
Your story hit very close to home here. I was married to a man for 11 years who was very similar...manipulative, Dr. Jekyll/Mr. Hyde (sp?), one day I was on a pedestal and the next day the object of intense sarcasm, beratement and hostility. I was alienated from my friends and completely changed. I became insecure and isolated. I feared for my life though he never physically abused.
I am convinced by research and reading other's experiences, that these people have a dark ugly personality disorder. And people in relationships with them can become crazy trying to figure them out and make them happy while keeping one's own sanity.
You are fortunate you didn't have children with her. At least you could get away.
I am sure that if the woman in this story didn't actually shoot the husbands herself, it is still quite possible that she drove them to despair with her manipulation and behavior.
Sometimes it's nice to be reminded that we are not alone, and that it sure is good to be alive and free from that.
Lisa

some people are so unhappy with themselves that they would do anything to get that happy buzz, and that includes taking someones life, the first major signs for these acts are INSECURITY, SHALLOW AND ENVY.... us guys are so easily fooled by these lady's it's crazy..when you come across these signs do not try to fix them, like you want to, let her understand what the problems are, then nicely tell her to leave, the next guy will benefit form this, you must have enough guts to tell someone to get the hell out or they will never learn, do it..

not only is this woan a black widow...one of the biggest manipulative sluts to walk on the face of the earth!

not only is this lady the black widow....she is right up there with the best of them when it comes to manipulation and slutdome!

The articles premise deals with harvested vital organs-somehow carrying an imprint of how the former owner died.

Recent movies on the same topic, would have you believe they do!

Christian Religous Teachings state, Those Who Take Their Own Life-go straight to Hell...!!!

Albert Enistein posulated that light sped up becomes energy, thusly light slowed down becomes matter.

A friend of mine, explained to me that Human DNA Double Helix during division following fertalization must carry an imprint of the growing Human-elsewise all humans would be alike!!!

Just as Finger-prints differ from one Human to another, So does Human DNA-therefore it follows that harvested Human Organs likewise carry, on the moleculer level an imprint of the former owner, if not why would some transplanted organs experience rejection by/in the receiving Human Body...???

Just because Human's with simliar blood types can share betwix them-it doesn't necessarily follow that tissue or organs can likewise be shared...!!!

Despite the ongoing efforts of The Medical Community to categorize and compartimentalize Humans-Our differences are as extreme as The Number of Stars in The Heavens...!!!

that woman is sick in mind and heart. What kind of a home did she grow up in? what about her parents?what kind of a childhood did she have. A human being does not get like that overnight? something went wrong early o clock and no one took notice. Now heaven help the men and marriages out there, cause it is obvious she is still carryin on her life without a care in world to any one else. If you ask me she is demon possessed and intends to take down as many souls as she can.

JFFU: Interesting post. Also consider the issue surrounding twins who were seperated at birth, lived completely different lives, yet later after being reunited share striking similarities in their personal perceptions and social interests, personal habits, likes and dislikes, etc.
Same with kids adopted at birth who later find their birth mother and/or father. The similarities in personality, likes, dislikes, preferences are so remarkably close.

One complaint that adopted children often have is that they don't share similar traits with their adopted family; that they sometimes feel isolated and alone. Often when finding their birth parents, everything about why they are the way they are suddenly becomes clear. For example, one young man hated a certain dish that all of his adopted family loved. Upon finding his birth mother, he learns she disliked that dish too and so did her mother. Might be a weak example but you get the general idea.

DNA studies are interesting, not only biologically but socially and within family units.

This whole story is pitiful, but the real tragedy is all of the children these people had. The most despicable person does seem to be this Cheryl person, who seems to be far from innocent and guilty of destroying marriages at the least, and maybe murder. Amazing how many men want to commit adultery with a pretty face, who don't even care what is actually inside that wrapping. Warning: just because someone is attractive on the outside is no indicator that they are not evil on the inside. Life comes easier to pretty people, and they sometimes fail to learn the lessons that make a person whole.

This whole story is pitiful, but the real tragedy is all of the children these people had. The most despicable person does seem to be this Cheryl person, who seems to be far from innocent and guilty of destroying marriages at the least, and maybe murder. Amazing how many men want to commit adultery with a pretty face, who don't even care what is actually inside that wrapping. Warning: just because someone is attractive on the outside is no indicator that they are not evil on the inside. Life comes easier to pretty people, and they sometimes fail to learn the lessons that make a person whole.

Yes, this is a very sad story and the woman clearly needs to seek psych help, but the article made it seem as though this Graham fellow followed her, pursued her. She didn't seem interested at first. Maybe if he had remembered his was a married man when he met this Cheryl, he would still be alive today. Wasn't the first husband who killed himself also married when he was seeing Cheryl? Tsk tsk!! Play with fire, you could get burnt; or killed in their cases. Like someone said earlier, the person who suffered the most was probably Grahams wife of 40 years.

I think the police should take a closer look at this woman!!

The Black Widow. This is a very poisonous spider that mates with the male, kills him, and feeds him to the young. The only difference between it and me is that I got to live! My wife has a web between her legs. I got all tangled up in that web and the harder I try to get away, the more tangled I get! I watched a special about the Black Widow on the discovery channel. When it was over, I went and told my wife how much I Love her and what she means to me and she said, "you saw the one about the spider didn't you?" Seriously, I believe this woman needs to be investigated for murder. Too many coincidences in this story.

First she loves him...then she hates him...then she loves him.

This type of black and white thinking, unstable emotions, and flip-flopping is characteristic of Borderline Personality Disorder (not to be confused with Bipolar Disorder.)

First she loves him...then she hates him...then she loves him.

This type of black and white thinking, unstable emotions, and flip-flopping is characteristic of Borderline Personality Disorder (not to be confused with Bipolar Disorder.)